Things Have Changed

I wonder why things had to change between us. We were as close as siblings, a sincere bond from the beginning. I never craved for anything more than your friendship, but recently it seemed too big of a burden. I never intended to steal your attention away from him. Maybe I just wished you were there for me as I have sincerely been there for you.

Do you remember you once said "I don't like the person that you are when you're with her"? Now I know exactly what you meant. I realize that this might be the price we have to pay for being good friends with the opposite sex. Understand that I mean you no offence. I wish you the best if things will never be the same again.

Hari Raya Aidil Fitri

Today would be the last day of Ramadhan, the last day of puasa for us muslims. Tomorrow would mark the first day of Syawal, the day we celebrate Hari Raya Aidil Fitri after a full month of fasting.

The joy of celebrating this festive day I have felt for many years. But as I grow older, the meaning of the day gradually changes. When I was a kid, the thought of getting duit raya and wearing new baju melayu painted the whole idea of Hari Raya. Not to mention the eve when all of the cousins would gather at my grandma's house to play bunga api!

Now, I have aged in such a way that this day would bring a whole different meaning. I just feel blessed to be able to celebrate the day with my family and friends. I'm thankful for the comfort of living that God has blessed us with. The serenity I feel every raya morning, the visit to my grandma's grave, the Aidil Fitri prayers, the beg for forgiveness, the visit to relatives' and friends' houses - my definition of joy during Hari Raya.

To all my fellow muslims who will be reading this, I wish you Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri and Maaf Zahir & Batin.

Beginning of a New Journey

Here marks my first entry into the world of blogging. I was recently moved by what a friend had to say about issues he currently faces. Hence, this humble attempt to voice out my own thoughts about certain happenings. The same thoughts that have been bottled up all this while.

To be honest, since I was young I was not taught to express myself the way most of us do. I hardly shared my problems with anyone, nor did I have anyone to lend me a shoulder. Probably the reason why sometimes I find it hard to communicate, to spill the words that reflect the thoughts in my head. All this while I have told myself that I was just built that way. Contrary to that, I am now beginning to teach myself to communicate better, to learn to understand others, and to let them understand who and what I really am.

I may appear to be loud at times, goofing around and cracking jokes here and there. But only a few people would know what really dwells within. This blog may be my modest way of reaching out to others, but at least I believe those thoughts are being heard somewhere.